Training Your Soul to See the Light
For many of us, we’ve spent a lifetime being vigilant. We’ve managed households, navigated careers, and held families together. While this vigilance served us, it often reinforced a psychological phenomenon known as the negativity bias. This is the brain’s tendency to register negative stimuli more readily and dwell on them more intensely than positive ones.
This vigilance, while protective, can prevent us from experiencing the glimmers of joy and positivity that surround us. Recognizing these glimmers is essential for a balanced life.
Why We Focus on the Negative
Our brains are essentially hardwired with a “negativity bias,” a survival mechanism left over from our earliest ancestors. Back when we lived alongside mountain lions and other apex predators, a single oversight could be fatal, so our nervous systems evolved to prioritize threats over rewards—it was far more important to remember where the dangerous predator lived than where the beautiful wildflowers grew. While this hyper-vigilance kept us alive in the wild, in our modern world, the “mountain lions” have been replaced by stressful emails, social media comparisons, and minor social rejections. Because our brains haven’t quite caught up to our safe surroundings, we often remain stuck in a state of high alert, dwelling on perceived slights and potential failures. This constant focus on the negative now does more harm than good, flooding our bodies with stress hormones and creating a sense of persistent anxiety that disconnects us from the present moment and the “glimmers” of joy that surround us.
Glimmers, what are they?
If a trigger is a spark that ignites anxiety, a glimmer is a micro-moment of safety, joy, or connection. It’s the way the light hits your morning tea, the sound of a bird outside your window, or the feeling of soft linen against your skin. Glimmers signal to your nervous system that it is safe to relax.
By shifting our focus from triggers to glimmers, we move toward emotional regulation and deep spiritual growth. We aren’t ignoring the world’s challenges; we are simply choosing not to let them dim our inner light.
How to refocus your energy
Training your mind to find glimmers is a form of mindfulness for women that pays dividends in peace.
- The “Glimmer Hunt”: Set an intention each morning to find three small things that make you feel safe or grateful. This shifts your brain from “threat mode” to “appreciation mode.”
- Practice Acknowledgment: Before you can move to a glimmer, you must deal with the trigger. Use the process of Recognition, Exploration and Acknowledgement to process difficult emotions so they don’t block your view of the light.
- Somatic Anchoring: When you find a glimmer, stay with it for 20 seconds. Feel the warmth in your chest. This helps the positive experience move from short-term memory into somatic healing.
- Keep a Record: Use a gratitude journal to anchor these moments. Writing them down reinforces the neural pathways of joy. Read more about Gratitude Journaling in this blog.
There are two kinds of light - the glow that illuminates, and the glare that obscures
James Thurber
Reclaiming Your Radiance
In this season of life, your energy is your most precious resource. Choosing to focus on glimmers is an act of self-compassion and a vital part of inner child healing. It tells the younger parts of you that the world is not just a place of “gymnasium rejections,” but also a place of immense beauty.
As you move through your day, ask yourself: “Am I scanning for triggers, or am I open to glimmers?” The more you look for the light, the more the light finds you.